Chinese Journalists: Keepin' it Real

China has started to probe dozens of self-claimed "journalists" who asked for hush money from a colliery after an accident [at Huobaoganhe coal mine] which killed one miner, an official with north China's Shanxi Province said yesterday...

The colliery paid a total of 125,000 RMB ($18,255 USD) in six deals with self-claimed journalists within one month after the accident, in exchange for not publicizing the death report.

Investigation is continuing into a further five deals.

-from the Shanghai Daily

Wish I'd thought of that.

The Thing About the Chinese...

...is that their condoms are solider than yours.

The Thing About the Chinese...

...is that they share their video games.

Mao Lives On

What is your definition of an "authentic" photo?
An authentic photo is one that reflects the person accurately...Technically, film cannot capture an image 100 percent accurately...Chairman Mao holds a special place in Chinese people's hearts. We must protect his glorious image, so a photo showing him old and tired is not authentic. Nor are photos showing him with black teeth. He was so busy, where could he find time to brush his teeth? Only by making his teeth white would the photo be an authentic reflection of Chariman Mao.

That was taken from a South China Morning Post (a HK paper) interview with Chen Shilin, a photograph retouching specialist who worked for China during the Mao/Cultural Revolution years and eventually became head of photo-processing at Xinhua, China's largest news agency. His Mao works include the 100RMB note and that big portrait at the Forbidden City.

Personally, I always just assumed Mao had a grill full of gold teeth. Guess I was wrong.

Cell Phone Shenanigans

In China, you can get a 50MB internet plan each month for Y20 ($3CDN) and you don't even need a contract. In Canada, they're going to start charging you for incoming text messages.

If you're wondering, text messages here cost Y0.10 (1.6 cents) each; calls are Y0.70 (11 cents) a minute.  That's why you see fifty old women texting on the subway everyday.

I am the Famous Wang Hao!

First it was the badminton bad boy Dan Lin and his antics. Now Wang Hao, "a marquee player in China's premier table tennis league" and Olympic gold medallist, is getting in trouble. Wang was caught peeing outside a kareoke bar and tried to fight security when they apprehended him. A witness caught him shouting, "I am the famous Wang Hao! I am the world champion! Does it matter if I beat you?"

The Chinese national ping pong team has sent him in for counselling.

Two other things about this story that make me giggle uncontrollably:

• Hao is a synonym for 'good' in Chinese. Wang Hao. Get it? It works on so many levels.
• News reports with headlines like China's Wang to get Help After Karaoke Bar Brawl

Smog Report

Much better today.

It's a Beautiful Day in the Neighbourhood...

...or not. Today's one of the smoggiest days I've seen.  That highway is a 7 minute walk from my house.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT ARE COMING OUT OF MY MOUTH?

Chinese is a really, really old language, and it's not especially flexible since it uses a (relatively) fixed number of characters. Some words from a long while ago are still in use, while other stuff has been chopped and changed over time. A small sample:

马上: soon | literally, (as soon as I get) on a horse
熊猫: panda | literally, bear-cat
电脑: computer | literally, electronic brain
上网: log-on (to the internet) | literally, to get up onto a web
大转: left turn (slang) | literally, big turn (works if you're in a car)
小转: right turn (slang) | literally, right turn

北京: Beijing | literally, "Northern Capital"
南京: Nanjing | literally, "Eastern Capital"
上海: Shanghai | literally, "On the Sea"

I just learned a good Tibetan word in Sichuan too: tashi dele, which literally means congratulations. But people use as hello, goodbye, thanks, you're welcome, whatever.

Will post on my trip in the next few days.